I didn't realize you could browse match.com for free, so I put in my zipcode and had at it. And I have come to the conclusion that I am far too much of a misanthrope for online dating. Upon realizing this, I decided to keep a running list of things that went through my head while browsing:
"What is wrong with his HEAD?!"
"You're only interested in women up to 5'7?? But you're 6'1! And so cute!"
"Hey, here's an idea. If you want a girl to go out with you based on a picture and a profile, it's probably not the best idea to post a pic of you surrounded by a bunch of slutty girls in a bar."
"You're Goal-oriented? WTF"
"Really? Your job is to sell medical 'divices' and you can't even spell the word device?"
"You're wearing a pink polo with the collar popped. That's a joke, right?"
"If you have a great sense of humor then why isn't your profile funny?"
"Manners are important to me. 'Manors' are not."
"Ew! ew, ew, ew, ew, ew."